It's Sometimes Hard to "Fit In!"

FAILING TO FAIL!

Joseph Brann

     I know for me it’s sometimes hard to feel as though I fit in with others. And, like YOU, I’m only human, but I have brain damage and was reported braindead on the news. I’m not saying I’m the only one this has happened to and it quite possibly could’ve happened to YOU too, I don’t know. But, ever since I received my brain damage and got out of the hospital I was disconnected from life-support in, people who don’t really know me seem to put me in one of two categories. It seems they either think I’m some sort of Superman who can do ANYTHING and when I show my limitations, i.e. being unable to recognize faces, being in horrific pain they don’t understand, or not remembering something that’s happened, they say something that lets me know they think they know I can do more than I actually know how to do or somehow they know my pain isn’t as bad as it really is. They might say they know I can remember a memory I no longer have, or they seem to think I can see more than my actual vision allows me to see. And if they don’t put me in this category, it seems they generally put me in the other category of thinking I’m too brain damaged, handicap, and mentally challenged to be able to do things I can do. So it’s often difficult for me to feel I fit in most anywhere I go.

      Even when I’m with family or friends, it’s still difficult for me to feel I fit in. Sure my loved ones try to include me and make me feel I fit in, but it’s hard for me to feel as though I fit in when my brain is understanding and recognizing things so incredibly differently from how others are understanding and recognizing things. When I look in the mirror I know it’s me because, I know it’s me, but when I’ve seen my own picture, I’ve thought it was my brother-in-law who looks NOTHING like me. It’s even hard for me to feel I fit in when I’m by myself because even with almost 20 years of dealing with “brain damaged Joe Brann,” I still have trouble believing I'm "brain damaged Joe Brann!" But, I choose to love it anyway and work to help as many people as I can. I’ve still been blessed with many talents and abilities I “shouldn’t have” and can still do many things I “shouldn’t be able to.” So even when I feel I don’t fit in, I still know I actually do because I’m a human being like everyone else, just trying to do the best I can. PLEASE always try to do the best you can, be understanding of others, and know YOU are incredible with so much to give and nearly immeasurable potential? Until reading my next blog and even after, remember keep FAILING TO FAIL!